KnB Fairy Tale parody
by roYaLAnemone11
Summary: Fairy Tales have never been different before especially when you add the Generation of miracles. Insanity, crack and hinted pairings... (if you squint carefully)...
1. Chapter 1

**Characters:**

Alice in Wonderland- Alex  
Queen of Hearts- Yosen Coach

Little Red Riding Hood- Akashi  
Wolf-Furihata  
Grandmother- Mayuzumi  
Mother- Mibuchi  
Hunter- Unfortunate Human

Snow white- Aomine  
Evil Queen- Momoi  
Dwarves- entire Touo team  
Poison Apple- Kagami

Rapunzel- Murasakibara  
Mulan- Himuro

Little Mermaid- Hanamiya Makoto  
prince- Teppei Kiyoshi

Cinderella- Midorma  
Great Great Fairy godmother- Shutoko's coach  
Fairy Godmother- Takao  
mouses/horses- Shutoko team

Aurora-Kise

Elsa- Haizaki  
Anna- Nijimura

Beauty-Reader  
Beast- Nigou/Kuroko  
The only servant that didn't turn into things- Riko  
Candle- Hyuuga  
Clock- Izuki  
other things- Seirin team (except Kagami and Furi)

Hahaha! I kinda dreamed of this and well it turned out to be crack, fluff and angst...

AGAIN Hinted pairings...


	2. Chapter 2

**Drabbles CRACK! Hinted Pairings!**

**(Y/n)- your name  
**

It all started with Once upon a time, and (Y/N) feels like she can't take the insanity no more. She didn't even know how it started for all she remembered was walking up in a room with a grinning cat, the Queen of Hearts (which looks a lot like Yosen's basketball coach) and a smiling Alex.

"Alex-san, is that you?" was the first thing she said.

"Yes you can call me Alex but my name here is Alice!"

You should have go back to sleep before it all started but because of your damn curiosity you stayed awake.

"We're here in Wonderland!" Wonderland? Alice? ALICE IN WONDERLAND!

"How-!" (Y/n) didn't even finish talking when Alex grabbed her and pushed her into a suspicious looking door.

"LET THE READER'S ADVENTURE BEGIN!"

"Don't break the FOURTH WALL!"

**1. In which you do not call Little Red Riding Hood little, or you'll be impaired by a pair of scissors**

Once there lived in the woods, a beautiful boy with a beautiful red hair, red eye (because one is yellow) and a red pair of scissors. He was called Red Riding Hood because of the red hood given to him by his mother/father Mibuchi. Well at first, he was called "Little Red Riding Hood" but they didn't know that the boy has a height complex, let's just say that they replaced Little with pshyco-weilding-scissors but it didn't sound good with Red Riding Hood so they left it that way.

And here comes Reader-chan.

"Sei-chan, could you please bring these basket of goodies to your Grandmother Mayuzumi." Reo-nee said to the beautiful boy. ("CALL me REo-nee, I am not that old to be Sei-chan's mother!" "And what?! I'm old enough to be Akashi's Grandmother?!")

"Are you ordering me?" The room's temperature dropped and the occupants shivered.

"W-well, (Y/N) can accompany you to the brat's house."

"Then tell her to go, not me."

"You can't see the wolf if you don't go." Heterochromatic eyes brightened at the mention of the wolf. Reader-chan and Reo-nee can't help but feel sorry for him.

And so the two started their journey. Then in the middle of flower fields, they saw the 'wolf' sleeping. Well actually it's Furihata, Seirin's pointguard. Akashi silently creeped towards the wolf and placed his head on his lap. He then started playing with his hair. (Actually, Furi's kinda cute. Not that you would say that in front of Akashi, You still value your life)

Then suddenly, the hunter appeared.

A nameless human begun shouting at the top of his lungs "LITTLE RED RIDING HOOD! I'M GOING TO SAVE YOU FROM THE HANDS OF THE BIG BAD WOLF!" Said (unfortunate) human didn't notice the black aura coming from Akashi. Furi on the other twitched at the sound and when he opened his eyes, he almost pissed himself upon seeing Akashi's scary face. Then he noticed the hunter who was always bullying him. He hid himself behind  
Akashi.

"Kouki, close your eyes and don't open them until I say so." With that cue Reader-chan continued the journey towards grandmother house ignoring the painful screams and yells.

-Line Break Brought to you by Izaya~~~-

"I thought the wolf's going to eat Red Riding Hood." Reader-chan said while eating the cookies with grandmother Mayuzumi who is enjoying his role very much. (Who wouldn't? All you have to do is sleep and stay in bed and wait for food. It's the ideal life of everyone)

Said Grandmother snorted, "With Akashi as Red Riding Hood? In your dreams. In this case, Red Riding Hood's going to eat the wolf."

"Ah."

"The door's right there. Go."

**2. Snow White isn't really Snow White, it's Aomine... oh and there's a talking apple**

You blinked your eyes for the fifth time. You know Momoi is bad cook but this has reached a whole new level. She was going to cook for 'Dai-chan' but for some unknown reason, said 'Dai-chan' ran away from the castle. She had ordered Sakurai to bring 'Dai-chan' back to her but being 'Dai-chan' that he is, successfully evaded Sakurai ("I'M SORRY. I'M SORRY. SORRY FOR EXISTING! SORRY, I COULDN'T BRING THE PRINCESS BACK!").

Ah. You were in Snow White story, where the princess escaped the castle because of the queen's horrible cooking. The princess then seek refuge to the Touo dwarves in the wood.

Anyway, back to cooking. You saw Queen Momoi add some lizards, octopus, cheese, a basketball and is that hair? You were turning green as you saw the mixture turning rainbow. And then for some known reasons it exploded.

All that was left was an apple. (How did it turn into an apple?!) But then you noticed that it was not an ordinary apple. The apple has a face and a pair of forked eyebrows you seem to know very well.

"KAGAMI?!" Said apple turned to you.

"(Y/N)? What am I doing here?"

"You don't know?"

"... no... why is is so hard to move?"

"Sorry to break it to you,,, but you're an apple."

"I'm a WHAT?!"

You had to give credit to Momoi, she's a genius.

**3. Snow White, Rapunzel and Mulan- ain't it a great crossover?**

You accompanied Queen Momoi as she searched for 'Dai-chan'. How did she know Aomine's location? Well she had a trusty mirror (said mirror is Reo-nee, "My role has little screentime! Don't you think it's unfair?!")

When you reached the cottage, you tried so hard not to laugh. Snow white's costume looks ridiculous on Aomine and the way he sings... Just ohmygoshIcan'tstoplaughing! Kagami on the other hand cracked up that he gave our presence away. When he saw us, he blushed from embarrassment and paled when he saw Momoi which made him run but slipped because of his dress.

"Dai-chan! I made an apple for you!" Kagami upon hearing this turned pale (you had to marvel at how an apple can be nervous, he turns pink. It's a cute color.)

"aahh..the queen's here." You turned to look who said it but you almost regretted it. It's the TOUO drwarves and dammmmnnn they are sooo cute! CHIBIFIED IMAYOSHI-SAN is soooo cute!

"(Y/N)-chan, Can you give me the apple!" Momoi waved at you.

"Please (Y/N)! I don't want to die!" Feeling sadistic you gave him to Momoi. Aomine glared at the apple and said "Bakagami, you turned into an apple? HA! Loser!"

"AHOMINE! You looked gross!"

"It's AMAZING how your eyebrows remained!"

And the two continued to banter. However what you didn't expect that a 208 centimeter violet man appeared with a veeerrryyy long hair.

"Mine-chin, If you don't want the apple can I have it?" Murasakibara AKA Rapunzel came.

"What?! Of course NO! Satsuki gave it to me."

"But Mine-chin, you said you don't want it. You even ran away just to escape from Momoi-chin."

"I can have it as a PET!"

"What pet?!"

"Atsushi, I'll give you snacks just don't eat Taiga. But you're right we can't leave Taiga alone with the 'Snow White'. He might corrupt Taiga's innocence." Oh-uh, is that Himuro-san? He's Mulan? And why did he bring the whole Monggol army? ("We're his slave.")

What you didn't expect was the dwarves and Momoi with some soldiers to take out their weapon.

"For the APPLE!" And an epic fight for the poison apple begun.

You left silently to avoid the crossfire.("(Y/n)! Don't leave me alone!")

You never knew Kagami could be so famous.

**4. I'll never look at Little Mermaid the same again**

For some reasons you think you would be scarred for life if you open the next door. But what can you do? You can't move on without opening this mysterious door.

And with courage you opened it. But you didn't expect was your courage to burn out suddenly.

There in the rock was Hanamiya Makoto with a tail of a fish while looking at Prince Kiyoshi singing.

"Wish I could be part of his world~~"

You're eyes were burned. Since when did Hanamiya-san looked at Kiyoshi-senpai with a lovestruck look?

You closed the door silently. Took a step back and cried.

"I cannot UNSEE IT!"

**5. Aurora is jealous of Cinderella's glass shoes**

"And I will give you three wishes for the day." The Great Great Fairy godmother (Shutoko's coach) in a grand dress with fairy wings said.

"You're not a genie Nanodayo." Midorima, the tsundere Cinderella replied.

"Awww Shin-chan, don't be like that you can have the prince by himself! You already danced with him!" Takao the fairy godmother encouraged.

"I do not wished to be with the prince." And that dear readers was the greatest revelation of all fairy tales. What princess didn't want to be with their prince? It's... It's... unheard of!

"Shin-chan..." Takao could only gape at the tsundere.

The Great Great Fairy Godmother sighed then asked him again. "What is your wish?"

"Answer it! or I'll throw pineapple at you! Ever since the ball ended you were gloomy!"

"Yeah right! He keeps on looking at the glass shoe. I heard that he lost the other one."

Midorima just keep on blushing.

"..." Takao raised his eyebrows in surprise but decided to tease the green-haired Cinderella.

"What was that Shin-chan?"

"IwanttogetbacktheotherpairoftheshoeTakaogaveme." (Re:I want to get back the other pair of the shoe Takao gave me.")

"Ohhh~~~" The others nodded in understanding.

"I-it's not because T-takao g-gave it t-to me. I-it's my lucky i-item for a lifetime."

"Hai~Hai~ Whatever you say Shin-chan!"

Then a golden haired maiden in the name of Aurora approached them.

"Ahhh... Midorimacchi is so lucky to have a shoe like that! Given by his one true love-ssu!"

"DIE KISE."

"Kise! BAKA! Get back to sleep!"

"Hai. Hai. I'm coming Kasamatsu-senpai... Mou~ it's so boring to sleep. Neh, have heard? Mulan, Rapunzel and Snow White are fighting."

"Really? Man, I want to see it!"

Then suddenly Reo-nee appeared. "I have cctv camera's around that place! Let's watch!"

And they started the film-viewing. ("Neh,, Senpai how can you steal an apple's innocence?" "...")

(Reader-chan's still crying)

**5. Let it go~~~~ **

"Do you want to build a snowman? It didn't have to be a snowman..."

"Go away Nijimura."

"Okay, bye..."

Ok that's enough...

Haizaki's glaring at you. ("Don't destroy our bonding time!")

**6. Where Beast is actually a cute puppy**

You arrived at an eerie mansion. It was said to be the place where the beast lives. Actually you're kinda excited to see Belle. But what almost broke your string was a talking candle... with a pair of glasses on his nose.

"Captain?"

"Ah! (Y/N) we've been looking for you!"

"Why?!"

"You didn't know? You're Belle."

He guided you through large halls and in an eerie room. The room was dark but what caught your eyes was the glowing red rose with only one petal  
left. You know what it would mean, beast is gonna die.

"He's here... Please save him."

Silently you walked to the bed. There you saw Nigou but what broke your heart was his dying form. Tears started to form into your eyes and you  
hugged him.

"Neh, Nigou... Sorry if I arrived late." With that you kissed the tip of his nose, the final petal falling.

When he stopped breathing, there you cried very hard not noticing that Nigou had transformed into a handsome prince.

The prince you had been waiting all your life. The prince that you've promised to spend your whole life with.

Your Prince Tetsuya.

"(Y/N)..." You opened your eyes to see that beautiful blue eyes staring at you. You hugged him for dear life knowing that he isn't dying  
and that he's here for you.

"Marry me..."

-Line Break Brought to you by Izaya~~~-

"Marry me..." You opened your eyes just in time to see Kuroko holding your hand.

"YES!"

"I-I thought you were sleeping."

"I am, I just woke up just in time to see my boyfriend propose. And I'm glad I did!"

You know you wouldn't exchange this for anything else in the world.

Your own happily ever after.

**xooxoxooxoxoxoxo OMAKE 1 xoxooxoxoxoxoxoxo**

"I thought the curse would be broken once I kiss the prince?" You asked the furnitures. Izuki looked horrified while the others paled.

"Well Coach did..." (Damn! Furi, kagami and Kiyoshi is so lucky to be taken away)- if they only knew...

"What did she do?"

"She cooked for us and before we knew it, we were turned into things... She said it will take three more days to return to our original forms."

"Wow, first Momoi, then coach... They are geniuses!"

**xooxoxooxoxoxoxo OMAKE 2 xoxooxoxoxoxoxoxo**

"Ha! Everyone but me (and Hanamiya) doesn't have a prince!"

Then the door was forced open.

There stood Akashi in his Red Riding Hood Costume holding a blushing Furi.

"DO you have a wolf?"

"U-Unlucky m-me... I-I wish I have..."

"Hmn. Only I ca have a wolf. I am absolute."

**-END-**


End file.
